Yippy for Yowp!

"Yowp" is a niche site devoted to exhaustive analysis of early Hanna-Barbera cartoons. Since a large part of my life is devoted to exhaustive analysis of early Hanna-Barbera cartoons, I'm pretty excited.

Yowp might dwell a tad too much on dissecting gags and recounting plot lines of specific shorts(1) but they redeem themselves in a big way with a vast knowledge of the origins and implementations of the background music (sometimes tagged "incidental music") used in Hanna-Barbera productions.

Much of the music you hear in early television was culled from "production music libraries." Pre-packaged music has been used since at least the early days of radio and Poverty Row B-movies. The libraries were delivered as a series of 12-inch discs or reel-to-reel tapes and usually came with a printed catalog that classified the music according to various parameters like length, theme, mood and style. Producers paid a nominal fee for the actual physical discs and were assessed an annual fee that varied according to how the music was used. Some libraries would bill on a "needle drop" basis: a pro-rated fee based only on tracks they actually used. This last practice has led to some problems with contemporary repackaging of old tv and film properties since certain library music was not intended to be licensed in perpetuity. As a result, I'm told that the incidental music in the "My Three Sons" DVD was changed because of licensing issues.

A typical disc might feature the work of a single composer or it might be tailored to a specific category of music or usage.Some discs might contain familiar pieces of classical music or recognizable period pieces (i.e. at least one rousing Sousa march.) Other discs might be devoted to generic "sound-alike" songs recreating popular genres like country or rock and roll but without relying on previously published (i.e. expensive) works.

But the true gems are the custom tracks created specifically for the libraries.

A good music library disc might use a certain melody as a starting point then rework the same melody in various ways (faster and slower) on different tracks. Each piece was usually pop-song length or less (1-4 minutes) As a rule they were meticulously metered and structured very carefully so that with a bit of editing they could be looped and extended or seamlessly joined with other pieces from the same library.

The music libraries were usually created for "non-exclusive" use. Hence you might encounter the same piece of music in Quick Draw McGraw, Gumby or a Russ Meyer flick.

The king of production music was Capitol records which released various libraries targeted to different markets under a wide variety of titles.The Capitol library is all over "Leave it to Beaver", "Ren & Stimpy" and many other programs. You can still find old production library discs at record collector shows and if you know anyone who works at a college radio station that has been around a while, you can occasionally find a dusty milk-crate in the basement filled with stuff that even the program diector wouldn't steal.

Yowp features links to great MP3 rips of classic H-B production music that are meticulously identified and credited to the original composer(s). Even if you don't get excited about the cartoons here, the music is a great resource to anyone creating short films or animation.(2)

Footnotes
(1)Whenever I read an article about a film and half the text is devoted to retelling the story, I feel a bit gypped. Filmfax magazine does this a lot. A ten page article about "The Creature from the Black Lagoon" doesn't need five pages of filler retelling the plot point by point. Old movie reviews used to do this too but they were cranked out on tight deadlines so they relied heavily on press book plot summaries to pump up the column inches. Likewise here, if I'm going to the trouble to read about a specific "Pixie & Dixie" short then it's a pretty safe assumption that I have already seen it.

(2) Well, not LEGALLY mind you.

Where the Weird Girls Are: "Ginger Snaps"

In anticipation of Halloween (and pondering the forthcoming reboot of Universal's "The Wolfman") I decided to revisit the proto-Twilight teenwolf tale "Ginger Snaps" and see if plays as good as I remember.

A 12-pack of cheap beer and a few hours later, the answer is a resounding yes.

"Ginger Snaps" has everything you need kids. Cute goth girls, blood, violence, casual drug use, slangy, funny teen dialogue (this Bud's for you Diablo "Hamburger Phone" Cody) and that extra special sheen of Canadian otherness usually found in Cronenberg/Guy Madden films and strange bacon products. Although unrated in the U.S. version, "Ginger Snaps" is very much akin to a hard "R" flick but in a strange Canadian-film-board-financed manner that eschews nudity while embracing the aforementioned casual drug use, a fucking shitload of F-bombs and gore galore.

And (in a bit that would raise hackles in a lower 48 movie) one scene features a public school nurse extolling the virtues of condoms to our young heroines.

Did I mention the multiple, graphically disemboweled puppy dogs?

I have been meaning to write something pithy about "Ginger Snaps" but those snappy bastards at the A.V. Club scooped me with this entry in their ongoing series "The New Cult Canon."

After reading the 'Cult Cannon' piece, I realized that maybe I was curious to see this after sitting through the cavalcade of fail in the similairly themed "Jennifer's Body."

Here's a little bonus I found on the YouTube. Something that my cheapo pawn shop dvd lacked. A neat little audition clip featuring the foul-mouthed 'Ginger' hotties.

"Where the Weird Things..."

Yes, it works. I'm pleasantly surprised. Spike Jonze may have a pretty good track record for mining gold out of erratic components but the combo of Dave Egger + James Gandolfini + Muppets sounded a bit too left field to succeed.

Armchair Freudians and community college psych majors will have a field day with some of the weird symbolism on screen. And despite the debate over whether this is a proper film for the kiddies, quite a few were in attendance, babbling away as I longed to watch the film in peace. It's fine for your kids unless they happen to be kind of stupid and illiterate. Nothing scarier or weirder than anything you might encounter in "The Wizard of Oz." The voice work was fantastic. Whenever I see "name" actors prominently featured in animation credits, I get a bit annoyed. But James Gandolfini, Chris Cooper, Paul Dano are credible actors with very distinct voices and they really sell it.

A.P. Magazine piece...

This is a piece I wrote for A.P. magazine's website. It's about doing shows at Cafe Metropolis, a small music venue in Wilkes-Barre PA. It was a fun piece to write, but for some reason they cut out a nice quote from Bayside's Anthony Raneri. The quote is restored here at the end of the article.

Also missing is the credit for the truly excellent photographer, Kristen Mullen, who has much better things to do on her day off than deal with me. Check out her work here.

A.P. magazine online-

For the past 13 years, my friends and I have been running our own "venue" - the Cafe Metropolis in Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania. We started out about as DIY as you can get, with a hacked-together sound system in a former paint store. It has been nerve racking, exhilarating and not very lucrative, but it's also been a heck of a lot of fun.

Opening an all-ages club is more complicated than booking bands at the American Legion hall. You need to take care of a million little details. You have to decipher health and safety regulations that were apparently written by Martians. You negotiate with landlords, cops and surly neighbors. And you have to pay Fall Out Boy at least $60 or they won't have enough gas to make it to their next gig.

Your Hoodie Can Not Be Used as a Flotation Device
All Time Low, Bayside, Cursive, Fall Out Boy, Gym Class Heroes, Hawthorne Heights, Mastodon and a million other cool bands from every state and more than twenty different countries have played Cafe Metropolis. Even better, great local bands like the Menzingers, Title Fight and Motionless in White have launched their careers on our grimy little stage.

The most important lesson I learned over the years? Running your own show is not quite the same thing as seeing a show as an audience member. It's fun - but it's a different flavor of fun. When I Am The Avalanche is on stage and somebody stuffs a hoodie down the toilet bowl, it's not going to wait until the song is over. When Ted Leo is tuning his guitar, and he gets interrupted by a screaming, naked man (covered in red paint) you know this is not like working at Wal-Mart.

...Location, Location, Location
The first thing you need is a suitable location. Ideally, you want a space that is at street level. Climbing stairs with Marshall amps is not going to endear your venue to musicians. Also, anything above the ground floor means dealing with stricter fire and safety codes. If you are going to attract touring bands, you need to find a place that can hold from 100 to 300 people. A good rule of thumb is you need three square feet of floor space for each person. Ideally, that means between 1000 and 2000 square feet (about the size of an average McDonalds.) Anything smaller and you are going to have a hard time booking bigger bands. Don't just scan the real estate ads in newspapers, get out and look for empty buildings. Knock on doors and ask around. Landlords are going to be skeptical and tricky to deal with. One way or another, they are going to know what is going on, so you won't get far trying to bluff them. And if someone asks you to sign a lease, please talk to a lawyer before you sign your life away.

Lawyers, Guns and Money
Being in it for the long haul means being legal, and that means wading through a maze of permits and red tape. Local zoning and fire department regulations are complicated and vary wildly from town to town, but they are usually well documented on line. Do your research. At minimum you will probably be required to have two exits and at least one bathroom. You will raise a lot of red-flags if you march down to city hall and ask them what permits you need to open a punk rock/all-ages club. It's not exactly something that makes the suits comfortable. Play nice and tell them you are opening a coffee shop or a cafe that features live entertainment. You don't have to lie, just make it easy for bureaucrats to put you in a category they already understand.

You also need a sound system. This is going to be your biggest expense. You can start by renting small P.A. (public address) systems from a local music store for between $100 to $300 per night. Eventually, we started buying sound equipment piece by piece until we had a fairly decent set-up.

It's (Not) About the Benjamins
Dealing with bands and booking agencies is not always a walk in the park. The first thing you need to calculate is what the promoters and agents call your "nut." This is the amount you have to earn from every show to pay your expenses. If rent and expenses add up to $2000 a month (not including what you pay the bands...or your workers) and you can do ten shows every month, then you need to clear at least $200 every time you open the doors. One typical method of compensating performers is something known as the "door deal." A door deal means you agree to split anything over your nut (e.g. the $200) with them. Touring bands usually want a minimum "guarantee" (an amount of cash agreed on beforehand) that they get paid regardless of whether anyone shows up or not. Sometimes the deal will include a minimum guarantee and a percentage of the take beyond a certain dollar amount.

We have paid guarantees as little as $50 and as high as $1000. Use your head when making deals. Be honest and upfront with booking agents and - this is critically important - don't be afraid to turn down a show if you don't think you will cover your costs. A hole in your schedule is better than screwing somebody over...or emptying your bank account every time a show does poorly. Do that enough and you can't last very long. Be sincere and flexible and most booking agents and bands will want to work with you. The idea is to create something that is sustainable in the long run. You have to worry about money constantly and sometimes that means tough decisions. Then again, if a band drives 300 miles in a snow storm and only ten people show up, don't be a jerk and give them half the door money. Give them the entire $60. Pete Wentz might remember that next time.

"Cafe Metropolis is the perfect example of a great punk rock, d.i.y venue. It is the kind of venue that can rarely survive in most places but in a music hungry community like Scranton/Wilkes-Barre, with nowhere else to see shows, they've kept their ticket prices low and kept the focus on music and community, not money. If it says anything, its the only venue that we played at on our first tour in 2000 that I still love to play at now." - Anthony Raneri (Bayside)

Old School Bruno

Craptacular!

In the tradition of "Legends of the Superheroes" and the Bea Arthur anointed "Star Wars Holiday Special" we present the ice skating/live-action/animation/fury masterpiece "The Hanna Barbera All-Star Comedy Ice Revue." -Scraped from the fine folks at Cartoon Brew

Calling All Goth Girls...

Here's a preview of what the well-dressed Siouxie and the Banshees fan will be sporting come March 2010 and the release of Tim Burton and Disney's take on "Alice in Wonderland."

A nifty panorama gallery can be found on the USA Today website here

A slide show of images is here. Johnny Depp is in David Bowie "Scary Monsters" drag as the Mad Hatter and Anne Hathaway is very ooh-la-la as the White Queen. Looks pretty interesting. Surprised this wasn't done years ago. It's a pretty obvious idea and 'Alice' is public domain, so if you're thinking of doing your own 'Alice' porno to cash-in, get moving.

I'm assuming this means the oft-rumored Alice flick from America McGhee
based on his twisted game is not likely to happen. Too bad. I'm a big fan of Tim Burton but I can guarantee that the inevitable and hasty video game movie tie-in will not come close to McGhee's version.

Scene Grrl Game Alpha v1.

Not much going on here yet. This is just some of the base elements for a game I'm working on. What was originally slated as an entry in a contest for games that were designed in one week has stretched out way beyond those hopeful parameters. My Action script skills are fairly limited compared to my ambition at least. I'm having trouble keeping everything neat and tidy enough to run at a decent clip. My understanding of global variables leaves much to be desired.

The graphics and content are the easy part.

"UP!" and at 'em.

Pixar continues its glory days run with "UP!" A story about a lonely widower (with a fleghmy growl just like Lou Grant's) doesn't really scream commercial potential but Pixar has the traction to take a whack idea and stick to it. One glaring thing about "UP!" is the utter lack of license-ready intellectual property templates. The Nickelodeon set isn't going to be clammoring for cuddly Ed Asner dolls and in this day and age, that's a pretty bold concept for an animation studio, almost unheard of in a business that relies on gimcrackery for a sizable portion of revenue.

Like its predesescor "Wall-E", "UP!" is at its best when it lets the pictures do the talking. A silent backstory set-piece in the first half outshines the rest of the film. This is a fairly straightforward outing for Pixar. Despite its eclectic premise, the bulk of the story is a pretty standard journey tale. Pretty and well-executed as it is, "UP!" seems a bit more story-oriented than the last few Pixar joints without a lot of technically impressive razzle-dazzle. The short that precedes it "Partly Cloudy" has anthropomorphic clouds that seems designed to show-off some neat technical tricks and is quite enjoyable.

And as for the 3D aspect, don't ask me. I "opted out" and chose the plain 'ol 2D experience (on celluloid.) But unlike certain parts of "Coraline" nothing in "UP!" seemed like it was designed or optimized (or forced) for 3D maximization. No pokey screen thrusts or jabbing fingers. And that suits me just fine. Apologies to James Cameron, but I think we all know that the current 3D revival is a bit of a wash-out artistically. Maybe it helps sell some tickets but it adds ZERO to the movie experience. Zero.

The Toothless Granny From Hell

Dang, but it seems like Sam Raimi has not helmed a non-arachnid related project in about a zillion years. "Drag Me To Hell" is a nice little return to cheesy excess from the fella that brung us "Evil Dead" and "Darkman." Gorehounds will bitch and moan about the PG-13 rating but Raimi knows what buttons to push and which particular streams of viscera can spout out of which particular orifices without getting into trouble with the ratings overlords. Its something of a cat and mouse game really. To say this is a tame outing - just enough Grand Guignol to get the myspace crowd into the multiplex - would be missing the point. If you wanted to compile a list of the various spews and splats of "Take Me To Hell" a more restrictive rating would not seem far off the mark, at least on the page. It's the small judgements that make the difference. Not lingering too long on the dead kitten or too closely on the blood splatter helps to keep the gross-out factor in check. An unrated directors cut would seem like a natural for the DVD release but I don't think it's really going to improve upon anything.

The A.V. Club review by Scott Tobias puts it nicely:
"That PG-13 rating may sound like a liability for a director who once hosed Bruce Campbell with torrents of blood shooting out of the walls, but Raimi makes a sly asset of this limitation. Just like other PG-13-rated horror movies, the film relies on shock effects instead of blood, but Raimi pushes those effects to a full-on visceral assault."

Star BLECCH!*

"Luke Perry meets the new waiter at the Peach Pit."

Much ado was made by Trekkies (there are apparently many on the internets) over the anachronistic** inclusion of the Beastie Boys rollicking "Sabotage" in J.J. Abrams "Star Trek" make-over (more specifically, the song appeared in one of the trailers a few months ago.)

The tune in question fits in rather nicely methinks. A young Kirk take Dad's vintage Corvette for a joyride and gets chased by "The Man." He turns on the radio*** - an oldies station presumably - and hears the Beasties.

More ado was also made a few months ago when ol' Billy Shatner started posting rather embarrassing homemade videos kvetching about whether he was or wasn't invited to appear in Abram's "Trek."

Let's tie this all together in a neat little conspiracy, shall we?

Many moons ago, "Celebrities at their Worst" unearthed a hilarious audio outtake of Bill Shat arguing with an audio engineer about the pronunciation of a certain word.

And what word was it that made Shatner set his Phasers on stun?

Wait for it...

The word was:
SABOTAGE.

Shatner pronounced it (roughly) Saab-Oh-Ta-Gee. The engineer gently corrected him and "Captain James T. Jerk" got all snippy and snarky. Some folks have sided with the Shat and pointed out that maybe "Saab-Oh-Ta-Gee" is an acceptable alternate pronunciation (especially for a rogue Canadian) but I'll leave that debate to William Safire.

Personally, I think Abrams pwned Shatner.

*To be fair, the film wasn't Blecch-ish at all. But I can't resist the temptation to give a shout-out to vintage Mad Magazine-style Yiddish-influenced neologisms. If you have a problem with that, go Portzerbie your furshlinger mom.

**Technically, I don't think it could be termed "anachronistic" - but I don't know what else to call it. Maybe "pandering" is a better term.

***Actually, it wasn't the radio but some fancy, branded gee-gaw that was an obvious product placement.

*snik* Arrrrggghhh! *snik*

"Splish, Splash, Wolverine was takin' a bath..."

I'm not putting it in the same category as "Spiderman 3" but "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" is a bit of a bust.

The X-Men flicks never quite did it for me. The suspension-of-disbelief threshold rises exponentially with an entire team of super dudes. Strangely enough, the two Fantastic Four outings almost pull it off with sheer goofiness and unintentional camp. The X-Men franchise is a lot less tongue-in-cheek and suffers for it.

This doesn't bode well for the forthcoming Avengers movie (not to mention the likely J.L.A flick.)

Hugh (not gay) Jackman does a decent job looking menacing and macho. It was cute the first time he assumes the hunched-over bodybuilder pose and runs towards his foe (while screaming to the sky: ARRGGGGHHH!) - scraping his adamantium pocket-knives along the ground - but it got a bit old fast.

Say, around the twentieth time.

Also, his hair always looks a little too neat. I smell another bad movie wig.

I've read quite a bit of X-Men in my day and while I sometimes get bored watching overly familiar backstories unspool (bit by a spider? Check!) - this franchise assumes a bit too much familiarity on the part of the audience. And I'm not really certain that it's coming from the film or comic continuity. I didn't really know who was who half the time. Spidey and Batman can probably dispense with detailed origin tales on-screen. They are pretty damn iconic but the X-Men universe is rather convuluted and not exactly a "no-brainer." It's been rebooted and retro-conned so much that this movie could have actually used a bit more of an intro. But billing this as being the titular origin story is a bit of a stretch. Most of what makes Wolverine so -umm- Wolverine-ish is barely even touched on, much less explained.

Not much of a story here in any case, especially without the preceding installments. This is not a work that would stand well on its own. And nothing particularly heroic as far as I can see. Yeah, they killed his girl, he swears revenge etc. But the turnaround in the climax sort of negates all that and makes it a bit silly. And, in the beginning - when Wolfie is involved in some clandestine dark-ops team - they never really explain what the point of the whole enterprise is. Hell if I know what it is. Some sort of sketchy, Dick Cheney Blackwater off-shoot I guess. For the most part it's never really clear if they are good guys or bad guys. (Well, until the raping that is.)

There are precious few eye-candy moments to save the day - at least none not already familiar from the trailer. "Transformers" had a pretty fucking stupid story but damn if it didn't have a pretty high quotient of slam-bang cool stuff.

It's not boring, but it's not exactly interesting either.